White Paper-Flyerfan1974

Content Descriptions

  • How helmets make the NFL more dangerous
  • Rugby Injuries compared to American Football injuries
  • CTE and the devastation it causes
  • The phenomenon of risk compensation
  • How taking away helmets will lower risk compensation
  • Risk compensation in other sports


  1. Main Thesis

Eliminating helmets all together will reduce the number of injuries in football.


2. Topics for Smaller Papers

Definition/Classification Argument

Risk compensation is a phenomenon that encourages more riskier behavior. It has been scene in football, everyday life, and all other sports. People feel protected by helmets, seat belts, pads etc, that they actually produce riskier actions that jeopardize their safety. For example, a football player with helmet is going to hit harder than one without a helmet. Helmets may protect the head from bad hits, but it is better to eliminate the bad hits all together.

Cause and Effect Argument

Due to helmets being used in the NFL, players are being brutally injured. Players are wearing helmets which make them feel protected so they make hard, risky hits. The hits that make the crowd cringe. These bad hits later result in concussions, and other injuries. These then can lead to CTE and other chronic joint, muscle, and bone injuries.

Rebuttal Argument

Helmets may still protect our players in todays game. They will still protect players from severe concussions and severe head trauma. They are very protective, but it is better to take out the behavior that causes hits that cause concussions. Even with a helmet on players still do receive concussions in todays game.

3. Current State of my Research Paper

My research paper is coming along very nicely. It seems as if this is an article I was born to write, because it is all coming together so cleanly. Each part of my research comes together like puzzle pieces. All the points lead to each other. With a few minor adjustments I feel as if my paper will be one of the best pieces I have ever wrote. More and more ideas pop into my head as I go and they add more evidence to my research paper.

2 thoughts on “White Paper-Flyerfan1974”

  1. This is good work, FlyerFan, but I would be shirking my responsibility if I didn’t offer constructive criticism. So . . .

    It’s unclear from your Content Descriptions whether you’ll be comparing ALL injuries or merely concussions. The argument may be narrower and more particular with a pure concussion-to-concussion comparison, but there could be persuasive evidence from an injury-to-injury comparison. Don’t discount either approach until you figure out which one works better.

    Your Hypotheses are incomplete, and they’re not different enough to qualify as two different hypotheses. Your actual hypothesis seems to be more nearly either: 1) eliminating helmets and pads from American football would reduce injuries overall, or 2) eliminating helmets from American football would reduce concussions and CTE.

    Of the choices you could make for your C/E argument, you’ve selected a wimpy one. We don’t really need to be shown that head poundings result in brain injuries. But we DO need to be shown that fear of head injuries would make professional athletes SO MUCH more careful that they would receive fewer concussions.

    Your Rebuttal argument doesn’t aggressively and persuasively attack your own argument. A skillful opponent could do better. If I thought your proposal was crazy, I’d argue that rugby and American football aren’t nearly as similar as you suggest. As one example, I’d point to the line-on-line configurations that pit players directly (one might say head-to-head) against one another for every play. I’d suggest that a wide receiver waiting for a pass to come down, standing defenseless against a defensive back, could be slammed to the ground in a manner altogether unknown to rugby players. That sort of thing. Can you refute that argument? If not, a percentage of readers will lie in wait for you to draw your conclusions and then pounce.

    Overall, I agree with your assessment, FlyerFan. This may be the essay you were born to write. Dot every i and cross every t.

    Thank you for posting early and requesting feedback. Your classmates may be watching and learning what to expect.

    I would appreciate your reaction.


  2. I came here hoping to get a sense of the current state of your paper, FlyerFan, in preparation for our conference. There wasn’t much new to see. I’ll count on you to update me on your progress this morning.


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